Well, here we go again. I had another baby, blogged my entire maternity leave, then went back to work and can’t even remember all the parts to my breast pump, much less write a post about it. So now, one month back into the grind, I’m finally coming up for air (i.e. hiding in the lactation room on my lunch break) and decided a blog post was in order.
But what should I write about? There are so many things to bitch about and so little time to type. At first I thought maybe I would entertain you with a tirade about all of the ridiculous “new mom must-haves” that keep popping up in my Facebook ads. Things like the carseat puke protector, which, OMG is fucking SOLD OUT. Is that even for real? I can’t believe people buy this shit. Whatever happened to plastic grocery bags?Or maybe you’d prefer the Samsung “smart” refrigerator which is “a revolutionary new refrigerator with a Wifi enabled touchscreen that lets you manage your groceries, connect with your family and entertain like never before.”
C’mon kids! Gather round the refrigerator, it’s family grocery list night!
But I digress. Because, I ruled out the dumb inventions blog post in favor of a rant about “sanctimommies” who are absolutely mother fucking POSITIVE that their kid could never EVER wrangle out of their grasp for long enough to fall into a gorilla enclosure. And based on the fact that I lost track of Mia for 2+ hours at a neighborhood BBQ the other night, I am pretty much positive that if she wanted to swim with a gorilla, she’d be inside a zoo enclosure right now grabbing onto a giant hairy leg incessantly whining that she wants to go swimming right NOOOOOOOOW. No NOW!
But then that story came and went and really, who wants to listen to me rant about other moms who rant in a way that I personally disagree with. #AmIRight?
So instead of writing anything at all I downloaded Snapchat.
I know what you’re thinking.
Or more likely….what?
Well, let me just tell you. I downloaded Snapchat and it made me feel way better about myself as a mom.
I know…now you think I’m drunk at work. But seriously.
It all started because I was pitching a client on some social media services the other day and I started rambling on about how Snapchat is really catching on and making waves and definitely “not to be ignored…” BLAH BLAH BLAH.
I did such a good job selling it I sold myself – which meant it was time to bite the little yellow bullet and figure this damn thing out.
So I went back to my desk and downloaded Snapchat. I am pretty technologically and social media-ly adept, so I thought a half hour would be sufficient to figure it out.
WRONG. Turns out I am too damn old for Snapchat.
So I enlisted the help of our college intern (how did I get SO old, I thought I WAS the college intern. UGH) who also happens to be my boss’ daughter to teach me what all the buttons meant.
The first thing I did was make a complete ass of myself by responding to snaps that people published to their “story” as if they were sent to me personally. *FACEPALM*
Then, I spent 45 minutes trying to figure out how to add actual friends. It was a little disconcerting the number of people in my contacts list that had an active Snapchat account. Even more disconcerting how many people are in my contacts list that should. definitely. not be. So I said “bye felicia!” to “Guy from WPI” and “Bartender at Peppercorns.”
Then I gave up and decided I would try Snapchat again later….like maybe when I get reincarnated as a 13 year old girl at a Taylor Swift concert.
Ahh but curiosity really is what killed the cat. It wasn’t a few hours before I was dressing myself in floral crown filters and face-swapping with my dog.
24 hours later I had published an entire story, and…it was actually really sweet.
Well, probably not to the world because I think only 5 people viewed it and I’m related to 4 of them.
I watched my own story at the end of the day. And then I watched it again and again and again and I was kinda sorta really impressed with what a fun day I had with my kids.
We did a lot of stuff! We went to gymnastics class and ran through spinklers and ate cake and even spun around with sparklers after dark (not Lucy, don’t worry). Our day really looked like fun. My kids really looked like they were happy.
I don’t know why but for some reason it was like looking at my life from above. Raw, real and in the moment. And it was so much better than I give myself credit for. Messy faces and blurry photos and all.
So that’s what’s up with Snapchat. You should try it. You can add me (ohbabyrichards) by asking your intern to show you how.